Sports: Beat Like a Rented Donkey

Cats more lame than wild as they throw away season opener
Eric Patrick Marr
Photo by Alex Orlov

** Addendum (Wed. Nov. 19). We just got embarrassed, humiliated and disgraced on national TV last night. Again. This time against Carolina. This is absolutely ridiculous. Ace's Top Dog can dribble and pass better than some of our players, it seems. ESPN's Gameday panel was ripping on us and laughing at us. Something is j-a-c-k-e-d...

#$%!#$%^&*!#$

I'm sorry for cussing. Yet... I'm so not. I HATE losing. I HATE IT, I HATE IT, I HATE IT. I cannot stand it.

We lost to !#$#$%^& Virginia Military Institute?! Isn't that a nursing home? Are you kidding me? After all of this, after enduring last year's horrific losses to Gardner Webb, San Diego State, UAB and Houston, we OPEN UP this season with a big thud?

What the ....?

It was 19-5 before we even got the fireworks smoke cleared out from the player introductions. They made something like 8 of their first 9 three-point shots, all wiiiiiiiide open. We looked completely lost out there, like a bunch of 2nd graders who'd never seen a basketball before.

We committed 25 turnovers that VMI turned into 38 points or something. Michael Porter, son, if you're gonna keep coming out and wearing our state's name on your jersey, then quit coming out afraid. Quit being nervous, for Christ's sake. Pete Carroll at USC wouldn't accept you being nervous and timid. You'd get your clock cleaned playing Wide Receiver in that fashion. Play your game, dude, take it to 'em. You gotta quit playing on your heels, you're getting keep getting killed and it sets the tone for the whole entire team getting killed.

All Wildcats, WTF is up with all these crazy passes and dribbling skills that rival a 3-year old girl's? Damn, my friends and I, we aren't overly athletic, but we aren't THAT STUPID. You guys played like you were up against the USA Dream Team that just captured Beijing gold. You let them dominate you with their defense, especially in the first half, and when they had the ball, you left them wide open, repeatedly, time after time.

Now granted, Jodie Meeks, you played your ass off. My god, I'm glad to have you back on our team. Holy crap we missed you like crazy, last year. Now you just gotta whip your teammates into (mental) shape. You and Patterson gotta take charge, bro.

By far our best five-man set is Patterson, Meeks, Darius Miller, DeAndre Liggins and Perry Stevenson. Their athleticism and playmaking ability is something we've been lacking in Rupp for too many years now. It's good to have some real Kentucky Wildcats back in uniform. DeAndre made one VERY critical mistake, late in the 2nd half, when every possession counted more than ever. On a fast break attempt, he came down and got called for charging, yielding one of his 7 turnovers. Once he learns to control the game (I liken him to Troy Smith, the Heisman Trophy winner from Ohio State a couple of years ago), and not make the costly mistake, he'll be really good for us.

I love what Darius Miller brings to our Kentucky Wildcats. His athleticsm, his length, his passion to play Kentucky Basketball is sweeet. (And since when is slapping the backboard after a highlight dunk a technical foul?)

Perry Stevenson alternates between playing like Arnold Schwarzenegger and playing like he couldn't care less that Dr. Naismith even invented the game of basketball. That frustrates me, and I think most fans.

After the game, during the press conferences, Coach Gillispie said, "they listened to their scouting report better than we did." Fellas, you play for KENTUCKY. You don't play for yourselves. If you don't like that fact, then go play somewhere else. Go play for Virginia Military Institute where no one cares about you, or basketball.

You better bring your A Game from now on, every time you suit up, because you have 4 million people who care about every step you take, every pass you make, and every shot you attempt. You better not EVER not listen to your coaches' scouting report. EVER AGAIN.

You got beat by a bunch of dudes who hadn't beaten a Div-I school in years. For some of them, their coach said, it was their first college game EVER.

And YOU were at home, on opening night, in front of 23,000+/- fans who'd been waiting all summer and fall for this night.

And you lost it for us.

#$%^&*!^?$

You owe us for this one. You owe us, big time. Bigtime.